epoch | inspector boxer and dj shiva

act 3

The sun was finally shining as the small group walked wordlessly through the immaculately kept cemetery. John breathed in the damp air, his keen hearing detecting the sound of a sprinkler nearby. His whole life, he tried to avoid places like this, his world already too full of death to need such a powerful reminder of it. He was surprised by how peaceful it felt. How welcoming.

Riley was buried here. John wondered if he should seek out her grave, but he didn’t feel like he had the right. She was here because of him. Just like the man they were going to see.

Sensing his discomfort, Terissa glanced back at him, offering him a sad, but encouraging smile. John managed a weak reflection of it, but his steps slowed to let them move ahead. He felt a new respect for his mother, coming here year after year. John knew she carried guilt over Miles’ death, but she didn’t let it stop her from honoring him or his sacrifice. She even risked her own life and freedom to do it.

Still a few steps behind as they walked through the archway of a mausoleum, John stopped short as they reached a small opening in the hedge. Terissa turned once more to speak, but John glanced down at the spot where he stood before looking back up into her eyes. They stared at each other a long moment, no words needed. Finally, Terissa nodded briefly and threaded her arm around her son’s elbow as she led him toward the small granite stone bearing her husband’s name. 

John expected his thoughts to drift to his father as he gave them their privacy, but it was his mother that came to mind instead.

****

It had been years since Danny had seen the cold, hard stone that marked his father’s final resting place. He hated this place, hated everything it represented. Unlike his mother, he found no peace here. It reminded him too much of the last time he saw his dad.

Just the smell of stone and fresh cut grass caused his chest to tighten and his head to pound as Danny became a young boy all over again, standing there in his home, watching Sarah Connor and his father through the open doorway. His chest had been puffed out in an attempt to convince them he was brave, but Danny could still recall how badly he’d been shaking. He hadn’t understood why or where his dad was going, but he knew that despite his game face that his father was afraid. It was Sarah’s fault their last moments together had contained so much fear.

Hours later, his mother, holding back tears, had explained that his father was not coming home. At that moment, his fear had hardened into something else. It was a very long time before Danny could even approach forgiveness. He was still skating around the edges of it now, still not completely convinced Sarah hadn’t forced his father to leave them for something completely meaningless.

It wasn’t until he had seen his father’s work for the first time at Kaliba that Danny had felt a real connection. Seeing the code, the elegance and the intelligence of what Miles had designed, Danny had begun to understand things about his father that went beyond his empty sacrifice. As Danny built upon his father’s work, he had also begun to believe that dying for some far-off cause had been a worthless waste. He believed that he could shape the future with his own work and make a difference. Or at least that’s how he justified working on a code his father had given his life to destroy.

Danny watched his mother bend to place a bouquet of flowers on his father’s headstone. That’s when he noticed the single rose that was already there. He was aware of Sarah’s ritual; it was why he’d stopped coming to begin with. Seeing that rose year after year had only made his hatred grow and fester. He would have thought he’d feel differently now, but he didn’t.

“Why does she do it?”

Terissa looked up at her son, recognizing the same edge of anger that had been in her own voice as recently as a year ago. She knew she’d once asked herself the same question, but now she understood the depth of Sarah’s regret. She started to speak, but Danny wasn’t finished.

“She just fights and fights and fights, and people keep dying, and then she just ends up regretting it all. So why do it?”

Once again, Terissa found herself in the odd position of defending a woman she’d once wanted dead. “You know why, Danny. You’ve seen what the machines are capable of.” She glanced back, worried that John would be upset, but he’d retreated to a safe distance to afford them their privacy.

Wearily, Terissa sat down with a sigh on the stone bench near Miles’ grave. She didn’t want to have this conversation, but it seemed Danny was determined. So much for the perspective she’d joked about with James a few hours before.

“Yeah, and I’ve seen into them. They may be made of metal, but what makes them tick is code. That’s what Dad did. That’s what I do. They’re not all-powerful. Code can be changed. Fixed. Cameron is at least proof of that.”

Terissa shook her head. “Careful. Don’t be so focused on the smallest line of code that you miss the bigger picture.”

“The smallest lines of code are all that really matter,” Danny argued.

“Do you think you can change Skynet with your laptop, Danny? Do you think it’s as simple as moving around some ones and zeroes? Don’t you think Miles would have tried that if it were possible?” She struggled to tamp down her anger at her son, not wanting to argue with him in front of Miles’ grave. She wished her husband was still there to talk some sense into the boy. “He did the only thing he could think of. He sacrificed himself to save us both. To save everyone.”

Danny shot a defiant look her way. “No, Mom. He did the only thing she could think of. And because of that, he never came home.” He picked the single rose up from the headstone, intent on throwing it away, but he hissed when one of the thorns found their mark, drawing blood.

Sucking on his finger, Danny’s mind spun. He knew the code inside and out, had seen what C.A.I.N. had done with it. He knew what it was and what it was becoming. It was just another puzzle to be solved. Any system could be hacked. For the first time since he had started at Kaliba, Danny felt like he knew exactly what he needed to do.

Terissa watched as his posture straightened, seeing a long absent gleam of confidence in his eyes that should have pleased her but only served to stir her worries instead.

For a moment there was nothing but the sound of the sprinklers, until both of them were shocked out of their quiet musings by John’s shout.

“Metal!”

****

When the topic had strayed to his mother, John had walked away. The desire to defend her had been fierce, but she wouldn’t have been happy with him for it. Not here.

So John boxed up his anger and put some distance between them, leaving the Dysons to mourn. If Danny needed to be angry with John’s mother to move on, John knew his mom would be okay with that, even if he wasn’t.

The cemetery was huge, he realized. The shells of thousands of souls rested around him. It was hard to process so many lives lived and lost, but John felt the ever-present weight of responsibility when he gazed upon the markers. Millions more would die if he failed, and there would be no flowers on their graves, barely anyone left to remember the fallen at all.

He stopped a safe distance away from Terissa and Danny but remained close enough that the breeze carried the faintest murmur of their voices. John glanced up, finding himself in the shadow of a willowy angel. Something about her features reminded him of Allison... of Cameron, and John took a moment to admire the statue, his thoughts drifting to both of them. So much alike and yet so very different.

Derek had once told him that sensing the machines would become like a sixth sense. That good soldiers could practically smell them... could feel the cold coming off the metal under their skin. As John’s gaze was drawn instinctively to his left, he felt the familiar sensation of his senses sharpening, coming alive as his subconscious detected a threat.

The crunch of leaves reached him first, and John turned his head, his hand already drifting toward his gun. Less than ten yards away, walking with a heavy tread and single-minded purpose among the graves was a man John had never seen before. It took him mere seconds to realize he wasn’t a man at all.

John’s training, having lied dormant for months on his return to the present, awakened instantly, ripping the warning from his lungs. “Metal!”

The terminator’s head turned and John knew he’d been spotted as he took cover behind the angel. One of her wings disintegrated in a hail of bullets, pelting John with sharp stone shards. When the machine stopped to reload, John did what his mother had always told him to do.

He ran.

John didn’t stop, his lungs burning as he ran toward the trees surrounding Terissa and Danny. Each step he took, he expected the pain of a bullet in the back, but none came.

Risking a look behind him, John yanked his own weapon free. The terminator was tracking him, his eyes hidden behind a pair of dark sunglasses. John squeezed off a few shots, knowing how useless they were, but doing his best to buy time. He saw the machine twitch just before he faced forward, and John knew at least one of his rounds had struck home.

Terissa was running toward him as he came around a corner near the hedge. John waved her off, urging her to go the other way. He saw it on her face, the moment she recognized what was behind him, and John put on a burst of speed, determined to keep her out of the line of fire, even though the terminator seemed to be saving his bullets for the moment.

Danny finally shook off his terror at the sound of gunfire and chased after his mother. Even when he saw the terminator walking toward them with determined steps, Danny didn’t detour. “Mom,” he shouted when she kept running for John, his tone pleading and scared.

John had nearly reached them when he lost his footing on grass wet from the sprinklers and went down. He rolled, seeing Danny nearly tackle his mother to stop her forward momentum.

No sooner had Danny reached her then another barrage of gunfire suddenly rained down on them. Terissa yelled for John but he urged them to run, his ankle screaming as he tried to put weight on it.

“Go!” John shouted, shifting up on to one knee as another headstone chipped and splintered next to his face. “Go!” he screamed again.

“Mom, come on!” Danny begged, grabbing his mother’s elbow and dragging her away from John. “It wants John. Get away from him!”

Terissa clutched at her son, pulling up his canvas jacket to grab the unused Glock that was still shoved in his waistband. Clicking off the safety, she aimed and fired, squeezing off rounds without hesitation. The terminator jerked, pushed back a half step with each impact. Danny flinched with each pull of the trigger.

When Terissa ran out of ammunition, the terminator calmly took aim. John surged toward them, colliding with Danny and taking them all down. White-hot agony bloomed in John’s right shoulder, and for a moment, he felt blackness rushing over him.

Terissa heard John grunt in pain. She reached for him, felt the heat of blood on her hand. “John!”

“Run!” John ground out, pushing her away.

Turning back toward the clearing, Terissa watched as the terminator kicked right through the bench where she’d been sitting, walking inches away from Miles grave. She looked down when she felt a gun pressed into her palm.

“Go!” John ordered, his gaze clear and intent as it locked on hers.

Terissa realized she was looking into the eyes of a leader, the man Sarah had sacrificed everything to keep alive. Before she even realized she was moving, Terissa grabbed her son’s arm and obeyed the direct command.

John watched them go, staggering back to his feet to be a human shield as the terminator continued to fire upon Terissa and Danny’s fleeing forms. Thoughts of his mother flashed before his eyes, and John said a silent prayer that she would forgive him.

That she would be proud of him.

There was no Sierra to save him this time as the terminator bore down on him, but the machine had stopped firing. Why waste bullets on a dead man, some part of John had the presence of mind to muse.

A steely grip grabbed him by the collar of his jacket and jerked him forward. John’s shoulder and ankle screamed in reaction, and his healing ribs bitterly complained, but he bit back the whimper that wanted to escape his lips. He would die on his feet staring the terminator in its emotionless eyes, defiant and ready for death.

“John Connor,” the machine intoned lifelessly.

“Go to hell,” John spat.

The machine tilted its head, studying John almost curiously.

Suddenly the world whipped by and John found himself unceremoniously tossed over the hedges.

****

Terissa didn’t dare look back after John pushed them away. She couldn’t watch Sarah’s son die, watch the fate of all mankind die with him. She could only run and do everything possible to save her own son.

Hand still gripping the sleeve of Danny’s jacket, Terissa swung him around in front of her, pushing him through a stone archway toward the parking lot. He stumbled, almost falling as another shot rang out, chipping the stone off the column beside his head. Terissa kept going, pulling him up with her and putting herself between him and the gun that seemed to have an endless supply of bullets.

“Why is it still chasing us?” Danny shouted between gasps for breath.

Terissa felt a sick horror wash through her. What if the terminator hadn’t been after John Connor? What if it had been after her? After Tango...

“Oh God,” Terissa whimpered as they stumbled out from the shaded walkway, shoving through a wrought iron gate and onto the pavement, both hitting a full sprint across the lot. She could hear the heavy footsteps of the cyborg echoing through the archway as Danny reached the car.

Danny looked back to see his mother still behind him and the machine at the gate. He fumbled with the keys.

Terissa turned, stepping between her son and the terminator. With what was left of the rounds in John’s gun, she fired, each shot striking their target in a closely grouped cluster. Her death was acceptable so long as Danny lived, and she’d buy him every second she could to escape.

The machine stopped firing, seeming to accept the punishment she was heaping on him.

“Mom!!! Get in the car!”

Terissa heard the slide lock back into place, and she threw the now-useless weapon away. “It wants me, Danny.”

“Mom,” Danny pleaded, seeing the machine start to advance once more. His mother faced him, looking calmer than he had ever seen her. When she hugged him, he felt something inside of him break.

“Danny, go. Now.”

Terrified, Danny squeezed her once hard and tight before letting her go and getting in the car. He looked back at her one last time, their eyes locking. Danny could see her resolve... and her goodbye. It was almost too much, but he knew he couldn’t stop the monster coming closer with every step. He put the car in gear and squealed out of the parking lot, tears streaming down his face as he realized that he might never see his mother alive again.

Terissa watched him go before turning toward the machine. She was out of ammunition, and she had nowhere else to go.

But when she faced the terminator again, it wasn’t facing her. The machine took aim at the car, pumping the few remaining rounds in his clip into the trunk of it as it screamed down the street, taking a corner on two wheels before it was out of sight.

Then, as Terissa stood, stunned, he lowered his weapon. Turning toward her, the terminator cocked his head to the side and regarded her for a silent moment.

Terissa stood motionless, breathing so hard her lungs ached. She twitched when he started towards her again, but he didn’t touch her. Instead he brushed past her and walked away, saying nothing.

“Terissa!”

Jerking at the sound of her name, Terissa spun, seeing John limping toward her. He was bleeding but determined, and she moved toward him without thought, stunned to see him alive.

“I thought...” she began, only to press her lips together in a fine line. She grabbed him, feeling him sag against her in relief.

“It didn’t want me,” John said, wincing as she slipped his good arm around her shoulders to hold him up.

“Me either,” Terissa told him, remembering how the machine had held its fire until her son had run.

They stared at each other, each of them realizing there was only one target left.

“Danny, ” Terissa whispered.

****

Cameron easily bypassed the security code again, her lips pursing into a disappointed line as she did so. She shoved the door open, expecting to see John peek his head around the corner this time, but she heard nothing, not even the tapping of computer keys.

Frowning, Cameron glanced back, seeing a new truck in the lot. She shifted the box of supplies in her hands and retrieved her gun from where it was tucked in her jeans. Scanning the area, she noted several small drops of blood leading from the truck and into the building.

Alarm made her want to toss the box aside and run to John’s aid, but Cameron quietly set it down before cautiously moving closer. She could survive being shot, but it was certainly something she wanted to avoid if possible.

Cameron entered the office, finding it empty. Her gaze returned to the path of blood drops on the floor, following it into the hanger. She heard a hiss of pain before she saw him, and all caution went out the window. “John.” Lowering her gun, Cameron surged forward.

John managed a tight smile when he saw her. “Good timing. I can’t reach...” He motioned at his bleeding shoulder. His shirt was soaked with blood and balled up in one hand. A first aid kit was open at his side where he sat on a workshop table. The wound felt like a line of fire, searing his skin and throbbing in time to the beat of his heart. He’d been grazed before, even on the face, but it had never hurt like this.

Cameron assessed the injury, determining that it was nothing too serious. She almost felt dizzy with relief. “Where’s Danny? Terissa?”

“I don’t know where Danny is. I dropped Terissa at her house. I figured Danny would either go there or come here.”

John hissed again as Cameron dabbed at the wound, cleaning away the slowly oozing blood. Her touch was surprisingly gentle, and after a while, John stopped noticing the pain and focused more on the heat of Cameron’s hand against his skin.

“What happened?” Cameron demanded, and John could tell he had no choice but to tell her everything so he did.

Cameron frowned when he was finished. “It left you and Terissa alive. It went after Danny,” she repeated, as if saying the words would make her believe them.

John started to shrug only to remember a half second too late that it wasn’t a good idea. He winced. “I know. Weird.”

Considering what she’d been told, Cameron lapsed into silence, wondering if she had misjudged Danny Dyson. If Skynet had sent a machine back to kill him, then he had to have some use. Unless Skynet hadn’t been responsible. Cameron glanced at John’s profile, remembering the day he’d sent her back, remembering how much she had resisted the idea.

“I told Terissa I’d talk to mom,” John continued, watching her as she processed what he’d told her. “Right now she seems to think we’re all better off not knowing where Danny is...”

“She’s right,” Cameron said tightly. “It’s safer for us. And for him.”

Cameron’s gaze was intent on cleaning his injury, her long hair falling over her profile like a curtain, obscuring John’s vision of her. Without thinking, John reached out and brushed it back, tucking it behind her ear. When she looked up at him curiously, John felt his heart lurch, seeing the echo of Allison in her eyes.

Something in John’s expression made Cameron pause. Feeling a little flustered, she defused the strange moment with a stern tilt of her head.

“Sarah won’t be happy.”

John quickly dropped his hand into his lap. “She’s never happy when there’s a terminator around.”

Cameron flinched but ignored the unintentional insult. “You put yourself in the line of fire.”

“What was I supposed to do, run away and let it kill more people? What kind of ‘leader of mankind’ is that?”

“The kind that doesn’t get shot.” Cameron stopped what she was doing and looked him firmly in the eye. “Getting yourself killed to protect someone else isn’t helpful.” Her cold logic shocked him into silence.

He may have said nothing, but the fiery stubbornness blazing from his eyes was a signature Connor trait she had seen enough times to know that logic would never overcome it. Cameron knew her reasoning was sound, but she also knew that part of what had made John a great leader in the future was that he cared about what happened to the people who fought alongside him. Cameron’s face softened a bit and John again saw the person instead of the terminator.

“It’s also something future John would have done,” Cameron conceded. Her respect was evident in her simple statement.

“Thanks,” John murmured, clearing his throat when his voice faltered weakly. “For patching me up,” he explained.

Cameron nodded once, acknowledging his need to change the subject. She went back to her task of tending to his wound. “It’s just a graze,” she confirmed in a clinical voice. “You should heal completely.”

“Not even a badass scar, huh?” John joked weakly, a faint smile on his lips.

“Not even a badass scar,” Cameron concurred as she offered him a faint smile of her own. Her movements suddenly slowed as she ran the wet cloth over his skin once more. “Not like your mother,” she added unexpectedly.

John remembered a shared joke between himself and his uncle, a brief moment of humor notable for its rarity. “Harder than nuclear nails...” he murmured, feeling a bittersweet ache at the thought of Derek.

Cameron glanced up again and her brow furrowed in plain confusion. John shook his head and let out a short laugh, finding this new expression on Cameron’s face almost... adorable. “Something Derek said about mom,” he explained. John watched as something flickered across Cameron’s face, a barely perceptible wave of emotion, before her eyelashes fluttered and her attention returned to cleaning John’s wound. Her motions began to slow once again before stopping entirely this time.

“What?” John asked softly, sensing his words had somehow upset rather than entertained the terminator.

“She is,” Cameron stated abruptly before turning away from him, dropping the blood-soaked cloth on the table beside them. She turned her attention to the box of first aid supplies, rummaging through them as she kept her back to John. When she spoke again, it was almost in a whisper. “And she isn’t.”

Memories played back with total recall, of Sarah at her most broken. So desperate and raw that she couldn’t remember her own name. Her green-eyed desperation as she pressed Cameron for information about her death that Cameron didn’t have. Her quiet agony over the son who had abandoned her for the future. Sarah’s body cradled in her arms, the sweat from a brutal round with the heavy bag rubbing off on her skin, as the levee broke and wave after wave of emotion burst through. She had seen Sarah fight, the most valiant of warriors, and she had seen her break.

And the scars. Cameron knew them all, could find them in the dark. She had catalogued each one in their most intimate moments. One in particular was seared into her memory. The one that had almost taken Sarah from her... the one she had caused.

John’s pained gasp shook her from her thoughts. Cameron stared at him blankly, trying to remember when she had returned to his side. Her hands were on his shoulder, taping the gauze to his skin. She realized she’d forgotten herself and pressed too hard, but John was watching her with curiosity rather than pain or anger.

“She’s not indestructible.” Cameron’s tone was calm, but she felt the skin on her face tighten, heat behind her eyes.

“I know,” John answered, feeling caught off-guard by the turn in conversation and not sure why.

“You once told me Sarah would die to stop Skynet.” Cameron’s eyes were full of emotions John couldn’t understand as tension infused the set of her jaw. “Only you forgot why she would do that.”

“She knows how important it is. How many people die, how much...”

“No,” Cameron cut him off, watching his eyes narrow. “I mean, yes, she knows all of that.” Her gaze left his as she smoothed down the last of the tape. “But that’s not why. She would die for you, John. She would die to save you the pain that comes with all of this. She does everything for you. Because you asked her to. Do you understand that?”

She saw the expected flash of anger in John’s eyes. “You think this is what I wanted? Any of this?” He struggled to control his anger. “I hate this. I hate that this is my fate... her fate. You think I wouldn’t spare her all of this if I could?”

“Would you?” Anger rose up in the center of her, bright and hot and edging her toward an unwanted but undeniable burst of contempt. Before Sarah, her world had been about nothing but John. Protecting him. Nurturing him. It was the one thing she and Sarah had possessed in common when they’d first met. They existed for him; both of them programmed in their own way to put his needs above all others. Cameron had listened to future John’s stories about his mother, to his regrets over the way he’d treated her and the way he’d lost her. Why couldn’t John see his mistakes now? Why did he have to lose Sarah before he would understand?

“You asked her to save the world for you, John,” Cameron continued as she put away the supplies, all too aware of him silently seething behind her. “You asked her to stop Skynet like you were asking to borrow the keys to the car.”

John flinched. “She didn’t do it just for me,” he began, sliding off the table to tower over her. He winced as he put weight on his injured ankle but it held him for now.

“She did,” Cameron cut him off with sudden conviction, turning to meet his steely gaze with one of her own. Images of Sarah’s scars, both physical and emotional, swam through her as she took a step toward him. The barely contained fury in her voice surprised him, and he took a step back, instinctively realizing he was on shaky ground. “You asked her to take your place, to be the warrior who stops Skynet. You would have let her die for you. You asked because she’s your mother, and you knew she would. She gave up everything. She gave up her own wants and needs because yours always come first. She gave up her self, John.”

John could only stand, open-mouthed, at Cameron’s passionate defense of his mother, the depth of emotion a testament not only to her new dedication to his mother but also to her developing self. It was both frightening and spellbinding, this new side to the terminator he had taken for granted.

The vehemence of Cameron’s words was unexpected, and as defensive and guilty as he felt, John was stopped from responding by his own surprise. Cameron’s anger was much more human than he would have expected, and she obviously believed every word. Her condemnation of his actions was heartfelt, and John struggled to find the answers that would justify everything he’d done to Sarah and himself. His gaze traveled over Cameron’s features as his jaw tightened and bunched, his excuses held back behind clenched teeth. He knew they would mean nothing to either of them anyway. As much as he hated what Cameron was saying, a part of him knew she was right.

John realized how close they were in that moment, feeling the heat radiating from Cameron’s skin. They were practically eye-to-eye, and John suspected the terminator was tempted to throw him through a wall. Her brow was furrowed in frustration and emotion, and she hitched her chin higher in an almost defiant stance at his silence. In a flash of insight, he realized that she was not only different from Allison, but that she was beautiful in her own right. She, Cameron, was not only a terminator who could stand by his side, but she was now a person with her own feelings, emotions, and desires. A fascinating, beautiful person who would be as devoted to him as his mother or Allison ever could be. He had gone to the future to find her, but he had had to come back to claim her.

Cameron saw the shift in his thoughts play out in his eyes, as he glanced down at her lips, his expression softening from anger. She had seen that look before, she realized, becoming alarmed when John’s eyelids began to close and he tilted his head forward.

In a quiet panic, Cameron stuck out her arm and stopped his slow forward movement. John’s breath came out of him in a harsh cough as he was pushed back a step. His eyes opened and filled with confusion and a hint of fear at the ferocity of her reaction.

“No, John.”

John snapped out of the haze of attraction with a start. Cameron’s voice was firm, tinged with a hint of anger, but when he saw her face, the look in her eyes was pure alarm.

“I’m not her.”

His defensive reaction was defused only by his realization that this was new ground for Cameron, and he needed to explain himself.

“No, you’re not Allison,” he said calmly. “That’s not it. I just...” John struggled for the words. “I can’t share this. Not with anyone. It’s not safe.” He remembered Derek’s words. “Everyone dies for John Connor.”

Cameron felt the pain in his words. The loneliness. “John...”

“No, let me finish.” He pivoted on his foot and turned away from her, needing some space between them to calm his hormones and his nerves. “Everyone dies. If I let them get close, they’re not safe. Mom’s been telling me that for years, and I knew it, but I didn’t want to accept it.”

John faced her again, a pleading tone entering his voice. “You’re not Allison. You don’t even really look like her anymore,” he confessed. “That’s not why... I wouldn’t substitute you for her. That wouldn’t be fair to either of you.”

Feeling some of her panic ebb, Cameron willed herself to stay where she was. Few things made her want to run, but the awkwardness of the conversation was making her fidget. She began to wonder what she would tell Sarah about this moment... if she would tell Sarah about this moment.

“You’ve changed, Cameron,” John told her. “I was attracted to you physically before. You can’t have hormones and not find you beautiful.”

Cameron’s gaze jerked to his face again, feeling the desire to flee becoming more pronounced. “I told you I’ve changed.”

John shook his head and managed a small grin through his discomfort. “You did. And I see it now. You sometimes actually act almost kinda human... -ish.” John snorted a little. “You’ve certainly got being pissed-off down pat.” He rubbed the spot where she’d shoved him.

Cameron wasn’t sure whether she should feel insulted or complimented.

Cautiously, John came closer, marveling when Cameron’s nostrils flared in alarm at his proximity. He realized he was making her uncomfortable, and he stopped a few inches short of where he wanted to in an effort to put her at ease. “I like who you’re becoming, Cameron. This... this... person,” he tried to explain. “And... humans... we don’t like to be alone. We need companionship. We need a connection to someone else. We could help each other.”

Cameron looked away, overwhelmed by the sudden thought of Sarah and how much she needed their connection... how tenuous and far away her lover felt from her at the moment. When she spoke, it was quiet and strained. “I understand.” Even her terminator circuitry couldn’t cover the thickness in her voice.

John paused, confused by her reaction and the depth of emotion in her voice. He realized that he believed her; that somehow Cameron knew what it felt like to need someone, to be needed in return. His thoughts went to Savannah, picturing how close the child and cyborg were, how much they seemed to rely on each other, but the simple, straightforward relationship couldn’t be the cause of the anguish in Cameron’s voice or the tortured look in her eyes. She only looked that miserable around...

“No.”

Feeling cornered by his nearness, Cameron had to retreat a step. She desperately wanted to leave, to go home to Sarah. The desire was so strong she could feel tears stinging her eyes, and when she lifted her face to met John’s gaze, she saw him react visibly to the sight. He was beginning to understand. Cameron could see it in his eyes, in the slow crumbling of his features as he inwardly tried to deny what he was realizing as the truth.

It hit him like a runaway truck. The looks, the touches, Cameron’s unwillingness to leave his mother...

“No,” he whispered again, feeling sick at the thought of Cameron, his Cameron, mooning after his mother. It was bad enough that she would have developed feelings and fallen in love while he was gone, but the object of her affection... his mother... it was unthinkable.

“You... you said you had feelings,” he managed, remembering their conversation in the park. “You have feelings for someone, what, who...”

Cameron shook her head, turning away from him, heading toward the door. “You wouldn’t understand.”

He reached out, tried to catch her arm and keep her there, but Cameron jerked out of his hold with negligible ease.

“Cameron,” John called, trying to command as he struggled to accept his suspicions, even though all the evidence he’d been unwilling to examine was finally adding up. He stepped back as she left him there, slamming the door so hard the monitors shook on their stands.

John let out the breath he hadn’t realized he was holding. Another chance for happiness seemed to slip through his fingers in the quiet that followed. Cameron couldn’t love him before because she was just a machine. She couldn’t love him now because she had become so much more.

Cameron had feelings for his mother. He finally let himself think it, feeling a blast of empathy at Fate’s sick sense of humor. Her newfound feelings would only make her miserable, since his mother was Sarah Connor. She could never return Cameron’s feelings, he thought; at best, she could be polite and civil, at worst... she could be a cold-hearted bitch who would take Cameron apart on a whim. John ran his fingers through his hair as he let out a long sigh. Apparently they were all destined to be alone.

His mother was going to freak.

****

James heard the security alarm being disabled a second before a key slid in the lock. He glanced at the time, relieved Terissa was finally home. She’d been gone far longer than he’d anticipated, and when she hadn’t answered his calls to her cell phone he’d started to worry.

Stepping out of the kitchen, James wiped his hands on a towel as dinner simmered on the stove behind him. He wasn’t much of a cook, but he thought it would be a nice gesture for Terissa given the unwelcome anniversary she was enduring. James felt his breath catch when he saw her standing there in the hall, a confused and exhausted expression on her scraped and bleeding features.

“Terissa,” he murmured with alarm. Tossing away the towel, James moved closer, grabbing her arms and turning her to face him fully. It was then he noticed the grass stains on her clothes, the rips in the fabric of her shirt and jeans. “What happened? Where’s Danny?”

“He’s fine,” Terissa vowed, only to shake her head when she realized that wasn’t accurate. “Physically, he’s fine. But he’s angry. He’s scared.” She clutched her cell phone in her hands, and James guessed she had just spoken to her son.

“Where is he?”

“Safe,” Terissa promised him, her chin hitching higher as she met his gaze for the first time. “He’s somewhere safe.”

Certain Terissa intended to keep her son’s whereabouts to herself for now, James led her to the couch and eased her down on it. “Let me get something for those cuts.”

“Cuts,” Terissa murmured, unsure what he meant. She glanced down at her hands, seeing the scrapes and abrasions for the first time. Reaching up, she felt her cheek, the grit from a pulverized headstone scraping her skin before she lowered her hand. Her fingers were covered with blood.

James returned a few moments later with a bowl of warm water, some towels, and a few bandages. He dipped the small towel in the bowl before gripping Terissa’s chin with his hand, easing her head to the side so he could begin to wash out the nasty looking gash on her face. “Who did this?” he insisted. “Tell me what happened.”

So Terissa did, describing the whole terrifying ordeal in minute detail. She could remember the smell of the wet grass, gunpowder and freshly turned earth. The feel of the canvas jacket Danny had been wearing under her fingers as she’d pushed him down. The sound of the gun still thundered in her head.

“Was it after John?” James asked in confusion.

“I thought so,” Terissa muttered. “They’re always after John.” Slowly she shook her head, her gaze distant. “But then it turned toward me. I thought ‘it knows I’m Tango,’ this version of me from the future...”

“Then what happened?” James prompted when Terissa’s voice faded into nothing. His own heart was racing from the description of events.

Terissa finally met his gaze. “It went after my son. Someone sent a terminator after my son.” She had thought she’d come to a place where she completely understood Sarah Connor, but Terissa had never expected them to share this. This added a whole new depth of knowledge about the other woman that Terissa would just as soon not have.

James’ gaze swept over the room, looking for anything out of place, wondering if Weaver had her hand in this. “I’m sorry,” he said tightly, his apology covering more than Terissa knew.

“Why Danny?” Terissa wanted to know. “Why would it go after my son?”

“Danny must have done something to help the resistance, something to thwart Skynet in the future.”

Terissa looked at him, hoping he was right but worried he wasn’t. “I think the terminator knew me, James. It knew John. It left us both alone.”

James considered that, unsettled by the possibilities. “You weren’t his mission.”

“John Connor is always their mission.” Terissa’s voice was hard and full of venom. “Even Cameron, under it all, was programmed to kill him.”

“I know,” James said quietly as he resumed his gentle treatment of her wounds. Weaver had to be behind this, he decided. It was another ploy to scare him.

At least he oddly hoped so.

The terminator in question lurked just out of sight, listening to Terissa Dyson’s harrowing description. She knew what James had to be thinking even though he was completely wrong. Slipping away, Weaver decided it was definitely time to give Danny Dyson a much closer look.

****

“Hey.”

The tone was Sarah’s first clue that something was wrong. She glanced up from shading blue into the sky and into shuttered brown eyes as Cameron lingered in the door to the kitchen, watching them both carefully. She sounded wary and afraid, and Sarah felt something cold wash through her.

“Hey,” she returned slowly, noting the way Cameron wouldn’t look at her directly. Sarah turned and met Sabine’s gaze over the top of Savannah’s head where the three of them sat on the floor, idly coloring in Savannah’s coloring books. The young woman nodded, having picked up on the same underlying note of distress as she did. Feeling her stomach sink, Sarah closed the books and gathered Savannah’s crayons. “Why don’t you go with Sabine to get dinner started, okay?” she told the child, giving her back a quick rub in apology as her gaze strayed back to Cameron.

“Okay, mom,” Savannah replied with a smile, grabbing Sabine’s hand to lead her away. Sabine gave them both a knowing look as she passed, one sculpted eyebrow arched high in silent question, but true to form, she didn’t say a word.

“It makes her happy to call you mom,” Cameron remarked, sounding distracted as she stepped aside to let them in the kitchen. Darkness lay beyond the windows now and she could hear the nightly concert of crickets filling the sudden awkward silence between them.

“Makes me happy to hear it,” Sarah finally replied honestly, leaning forward a little in an attempt to make eye contact. Cameron was having none of it, though, her gaze fixed stubbornly on the floor. Sarah bit her lip, feeling her nerves stir like a hornets’ nest. She took a breath and braced herself. “What is it?” she asked when she knew they were alone.

“We promised... no more secrets,” Cameron began solemnly.

Sarah looked at the crayons in her hand when one of them snapped, realizing that her hands had balled into fists. “You’ve kept something else from me,” she murmured, trying to keep the edge of anger and fear out of her voice.

“Only for about forty-five minutes,” Cameron admitted in a serious tone.

Opening her mouth to reply, Sarah shut it again and shook her head a little before glancing back at the terminator. “Forty five whole minutes, huh?” she asked dryly.

Cameron finally looked at her, confused by the hint of humor tinting Sarah’s words. “I should have called and told you over the phone.”

“Why didn’t you?” Sarah asked, easing back to lean against the couch, feeling a measure of relief that whatever was on Cameron’s mind was at least fresh and not some long-cloaked truth. She set the crayons on the coffee table and gave Cameron her full attention.

“It seemed like something I should tell you in person.” Cameron held her gaze now, clearly stealing herself for whatever she was about to reveal.

Sarah took a slow breath. “Then tell me,” she instructed.

“A terminator tried to kill Danny.”

Sarah was immediately on her feet and two steps toward the closest hidden weapon.

“He’s fine,” Cameron promised quickly, stepping forward to grab Sarah’s arm. “Everyone is fine.”

“It found them at the hanger?”

Cameron shook her head. “At the cemetery.”

Sarah sucked down a cold breath and raked a hand through her hair, chilled and disgusted that one of the metal bastards would look for them at Miles’ grave. “Terissa...”

“She’s fine,” Cameron repeated. “They all got away.”

“It went after Danny?” Sarah repeated, certain she didn’t hear her lover correctly. “What would it want with that kid?”

“I don’t know.” Cameron dropped her gaze. “John was wounded in the attack,” she continued, feeling Sarah bristle.

“What the hell was John doing there?” Sarah spat.

“All that matters is that he’s fine. He was grazed saving Terissa and her son. It was minor. He won’t even have a badass scar.”

Sarah settled on the arm of the couch, feeling like her legs were suddenly too weak to hold her. “Where is he? Where’s John?”

“Back at the hanger. I patched him up myself. It was a minor graze.”

Sarah shivered, knowing that a bullet had come close enough to her son to sear skin. “Let me guess, he didn’t want you to tell me,” she said bitterly. When Cameron didn’t answer, Sarah lifted her gaze and found her lover staring at her boots. “What?” she snapped, realizing there was more.

Cameron flinched. “John misses Allison. He feels alone,” she began, trying to excuse John’s behavior as best as she was able.

Sarah’s brow furrowed. “What does that have to do with a terminator trying to kill Danny?”

Cameron shifted, managing to look incredibly uncomfortable, even for a machine. “One incident led to another.”

“Another terminator?” Sarah asked, feeling her head start to hurt.

“Another incident,” Cameron clarified. “John...” She looked at Sarah, her features a perfect mix of apology and chagrin. “He tried to kiss me.”

For several moments, all Cameron could hear was the murmur of voices in the kitchen and the accelerated beats of Sarah’s heart. Her lover finally stood, moving away several paces and putting her hands on either side of the nearest window. Cameron wasn’t sure what she was watching out there, but she suspected Sarah’s gaze was more inward than on the backyard.

“And what did you do?” Sarah asked, her voice rough.

Cameron stared at the tense set of Sarah’s shoulder blades, cocking her head to the side when she detected an interesting tone to Sarah’s voice she’d never heard before. “I stopped him,” she answered, thinking that would be obvious.

Sarah shifted so she could look back at her, her green eyes searching Cameron’s features. “You stopped him,” she repeated, sounding unconvinced.

“I politely declined.”

Snorting at the response, Sarah shook her head. “There was always something between you two...” she murmured, her throat rippling around a rough swallow. “I told you I didn’t like the way he responded to you.”

Cameron drifted closer, drawn, as always, by a need to soothe Sarah when she was upset. “Anything you perceived as being between me and John before he jumped to the future is just that. A perception. Nothing ever happened between us.” It wasn’t the whole truth but it was close enough that Cameron felt no remorse.

“Nothing?” Sarah asked, the strange tone in her voice growing more pronounced.

Cameron understood with a flash of insight, feeling strangely pleased in reaction. “You’re jealous,” she blurted.

Sarah did not look amused.

Stifling the inappropriate response to smile, Cameron made sure to keep her face blank. “Nothing happened between me and John. Not today. Not before.”

“He jumped to the future for you.” Sarah couldn’t let it go. She’d always been too afraid to push for the truth before but she couldn’t seem to stop now.

Nodding slowly, Cameron admitted that was true. She’d known John was attracted to her, had used that attraction when it suited her, but she’d never crossed the line and neither had John. “But there was never anything physical between us. I swear.”

Sarah shook her head again, her eyes lifting to the ceiling as she struggled to deal with her emotions.

Coming even closer, Cameron warily put her hands on Sarah’s arms, willing the other woman to look at her. “I have never loved John. Not your John or even future John. I only love you.”

Green eyes fixed on Cameron’s, and she was fascinated by the play of emotions reflected back at her. She loved Sarah’s eyes, never ceasing to be captivated by them. “I told him no,” Cameron repeated. “But he didn’t understand. He feels alone. We talked...”

“He is alone,” Sarah murmured. “I know what he feels... how he feels.” She looked at Cameron, savoring the heat of her, the feel of skin on skin. The urge to lean in, to feel Cameron’s arms slip around her had her swaying slightly but she resisted with effort. Rubbing a hand over her features, she turned away, moving back to the window. “I had to feel that way for his whole life. Charley was the only one who came close to changing that.”

Cameron stood still, unsure how to react to what Sarah was saying. “Do you still feel that way?” she asked hesitantly.

Dropping her head, Sarah’s lips formed a tight line. Slowly, she shook her head before looking back at Cameron. “You know I don’t,” she said softly. “I never wanted this, what’s between us. It gets in the way of the mission. I’ve drilled it into John that he needs to be alone. That it’s better for him... better for everyone.”

Cameron found herself suddenly mute, unable to express any of the terror Sarah’s words were invoking in her.

“I was wrong,” Sarah whispered. “At least a little.” She held Cameron’s gaze. “No one can be alone forever. We need others to survive. I need you,” she confessed. “I can’t... I can’t live without you now.” Swallowing, Sarah took a step toward her lover, not missing how still Cameron was. “You both save and damn me, Cameron. And I think I do the same for you.”

“You do,” Cameron managed after a moment.

“I know how he feels,” Sarah repeated. “I know how I’ve made him feel. I can’t fault him for wanting...” She swallowed again.

“What we have,” Cameron realized.

They stared at each other until Sarah shook her head again and looked away. Seconds later, she felt Cameron’s arms slip around her waist from behind and she leaned into her without hesitation, needing her strength.

“I’m sorry,” Cameron murmured.

“Did you tell him?” Sarah had to know, not sure what she wanted the answer to be. “About us?”

“No,” Cameron promised quickly. “But I must have said something... done something...” She was quiet a moment, listening to the happy sounds of Savannah’s chatter from the kitchen as she breathed in Sarah’s distinctive scent. “He guessed. John guessed about my feelings for you.”

Sarah closed her eyes, absorbing all Cameron was telling her and trying to make sense of it. She frowned. “Your feelings for me...” she said slowly. “What about my feelings for you?” she turned her head, meeting Cameron’s eyes over her shoulder.

“I don’t think he knows. He probably thinks it’s all one-sided.”

“He’ll warn me,” Sarah said with a weak smirk. “He’ll come to tell me that I’m leading a terminator on.” She shook her head again. “Perfect. Just perfect.” She felt her nostrils flare as Cameron’s touch urged her around before reaching up to cup her face. “Thank you,” she managed, feeling a little short of breath as Cameron watched her carefully. “For telling me.” Exhausted from the whole exchange, Sarah leaned into Cameron’s touch, feeling her lover’s thumb gently stroking her cheek.

“You were jealous,” Cameron said again, a tiny, pleased smile forming on her lips that made Sarah’s hormones jump.

There was no use denying it. “You don’t have to seem so pleased with yourself, Tin...” The rest of the endearment was consumed by Cameron’s mouth on hers, a slow tease Sarah had desperately missed. Instinctively, her hands slipped over Cameron’s hips, drawing her closer until their bodies melded. Sarah felt the contact sing through her blood, felt her need for the other woman burn through her.

But her head wasn’t ready to trust again so easily, and Sarah reluctantly withdrew, just a little, only to nearly change her mind when she saw the hunger in Cameron’s eyes.

“I’m sorry,” Cameron breathed again into Sarah’s ear.

“I’m not,” Sarah promised, clearly catching Cameron by surprise with the admission. She felt Cameron’s confusion radiate through her lover’s body and she leaned back just enough to see it reflected in Cameron’s eyes. “I want this... again... with you,” Sarah confessed. “I’m just...”

“Not ready,” Cameron realized with sudden insight. “I understand.”

Tension eased from Cameron’s body and Sarah felt her own relax in reaction. As hard as the conversation they’d just had was, Sarah could tell the air was cleaner between them now. “I just need a little more time.” Green eyes studied brown and Sarah felt her resolve falter. They were close enough to share body heat, and Sarah remembered all too well how warm and distracting the body brushing hers could be.

“I’m sorry,” Cameron repeated for a third time, seeing the painfully hesitant look on Sarah’s face.

“It’s okay,” Sarah whispered. “I just...”

Cameron’s face slowly eased into a genuine smile. “You were jealous,” she declared again.

Sarah couldn’t help but chuckle at how triumphant Cameron sounded. “Fine. I was jealous. Of my own son. We’re living a damn soap opera.” She stepped away from Cameron and temptation, flopping down onto the couch. “Anything else I should know?” Sarah asked, feeling the awkwardness of the situation settle over her in the absence of Cameron’s heat.

“Isn’t that enough?”

Rubbing at her eyes before pinching the bridge of her nose, Sarah had to admit Cameron had a point. “Plenty.”

“What are you going to do?” Cameron asked curiously.

Sarah sighed. Leaning forward, she laced her fingers and stared at the floor. “I need to think for a little while,” she admitted. Her expression turned wry once more as she glanced back up at Cameron, knowing the terminator detected the flush of desire on her face. “Alone,” she said pointedly.

Cameron’s head tilted a little to the right as she processed the full meaning of Sarah’s words. “Right,” she agreed with a slight bob of her head. For a moment, she looked lost, unsure which way offered the quickest exit. Finally, Cameron settled on the kitchen and moved toward it with purpose, missing the almost imperceptible grin on Sarah’s features.

“A damn soap opera,” Sarah grumbled again when Cameron was gone. Her gaze drifted to the window as she thought about the impending conversation with her son. She had a choice to make, and the knowledge caused the smile to fade from her lips.

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